The daily log of Andrew D Pilat for Friday, October 15, 2021

A fucking nightmare

Run

: 8.00 Kilometer(s) : 00:25:25 : 00:05:06.78 /mile : renewals : 0.0

Run

: 5.00 Mile(s) : 00:40:00 : 00:08:00 /mile : renewals : 0.0

Daily Note

Felt good on the warmup. Felt like it was going to be a good race. But it went absolutely terrible. This was a race I had been dreaming about since Louisville didn’t go well but it was a fucking nightmare of a race. I had nothing in the legs 2K in. I always fought back I never felt like I gave up, even at the end of the race I was doing my best to pass people. It’s easy to look at this as an outsider and say “don’t give up” or “keep your head up” but when you’ve had as complicated of a history with this sport as I have it’s not that simple. For me, this was almost a confirmation that I could train as hard as I want, put in the work, and all of that good stuff and it simply wouldn’t make the difference. Our 1-4 was in the top 15 and I was our 5th guy today in 99th. We ended up losing the meet,. I wasn’t in a bad spot mentally, I got good sleep, ate enough, drank enough water. Don’t know if I chalk this up as just a bad race or if I really just peaked at Walt Crawford and this is as good as it gets. Feel helpless and like I was just thrown back into whatever mental hole I was in during the spring. On the other hand, this is probably a slight over reaction. I think I just feel shitty about letting the team down but at the same time I maintain that I did everything I could during the race. I think I'm just hitting the mid season dead legs. I'm confident that I'm in great shape, I just need to freshen up in time for conference to boost my confidence for regionals.

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