I've been in a weird state since the new year where I'm kinda constantly thinking about track and what should've been. Last weekend was especially rough cuz the whole time I was like "damn yeah we would've been racing for the first time." idk but since January 1st I've kinda had a mind shift where it went from being something in the back of my mind to something that's kinda always haunting me. Also as somebody who has advocated since day 1 to let more ppl back on campus I feel like I can say that I am very happy that the first years are finally on campus and at the same time acknowledge that at the same time this fact is making me more depressed and pissed off.